Week 1 - Day 1

So I have begun a new journey today.  This is something that is going to be very important to me as it will help me to not only improve my communication with my family, but hopefully to improve myself as a whole.

I am talking about the Orange Rhino Challenge, and this is how it works:

I have vowed to NOT yell at my kids.  Yes, I am a yeller.  I don't like it.  I don't like the person I become when I yell, and I don't like what it makes me and my children feel like once I have done so.  There is a difference between yelling TO your kids and yelling AT your kids.  Sadly, I do far too much of the latter.  This is not how I want to be remembered as a mother, or as a person.  I want my children to grow up knowing I loved them despite the times when they refuse to listen, or do something I don't like.  I feel like I have grown to be far too impatient, too high-strung, too stressed, and too angry to truly function as the wife and mother my family deserves.

This is not going to be easy by any means, but I know it is doable.  I just need to remain committed to this challenge, and be proactive in staying motivated and confident in my abilities.

This is where the interactive thing comes in that I mentioned in my Facebook post:  I need YOU.  Yes, YOU!  I will not be able to stay encouraged enough on my own.  I know this about myself (which is why I haven't even begun to exercise yet because I am just not motivated enough on my own lol).  If you feel apt to do so PLEASE help me along this new path by reminding me to at least blog if not vlog about my journey each day, to write down my triggers, to find new ways to calm myself down before going off the deep end.  I know it may not seem like it now, but I truly feel that if I can commit to this 100% with your help along the way, I will not only be a far better mother to by handsome boys, but a better wife, a better daughter, and a better friend.

I will tell you that today, I have already failed before the day began.  I yelled.  And as soon as I did I cursed myself in my head because I knew I had already failed my first day.  However, I am not quitting today just because I screwed up.  In fact, as I was in the middle of typing this Zachary came up to me asking for candy.  Now, he has already had two fun-sized packs of M & M's so I told him no.  He said (or rather whined) that he was hungry so I calmly offered him alternatives.  He whined more and continued to insist and whine for candy, and as my frustration and anger built up I did my best to be stern and not yell.  Thankfully, I diverted the argument by offering to let him go outside and play in the backyard even though I have JUST given him a bath, and I really don't want him getting dirty, but it's either that or I wouldn't be typing now...I'd be yelling at him.  So, yay!  Achievement! =p

It's going to take a LOT of self discipline to make this work, and I am not sure I am going to be able to succeed every day, but I am going to try my very best to stay focused on the goal at hand.  With your help I think I can concur this! ;)

If you would like, you can watch my vlog that will be accompanying this blog.  Some days I may not be able to vlog, but I am going to make a point to remember to blog every day to keep track of my progress and log my triggers as I notice them.

You can see that video here:

(Will link as soon as I can get the video sorted out... having trouble with editing and uploads. meh)

Also, here is the link that talks about the Orange Rhino Challenge!

http://theorangerhino.com/the-challenge-details/

This will lead you to other links with some steps on getting started, committing yourself to the challenge if you feel so inclined, and some other goodies to help you along the way!  Please explore it and understand it because if you will go on this journey with me, you will need to understand why I may act odd, or simply nuts at times when I am trying to control my anger lol.

Thanks you for doing this with me!  Hopefully I will not let anyone down (most importantly my kids and myself).

Here's to continuing Day One with success!

<3 Dawn

P.S: at the time of this posting I will have also completed day to you can hear about that in my blog once I get it posted lol in the meantime let's just say that it was a pretty decent day with minimal yelling :-) this might not be as hard as I thought but I am NOT about to underestimate the true challenge of this project!